I'm going through the corrections from betareaders, and they all trip over the same words in one way or another. With your permission, I would like to present it you, because I have now stared myself blind on it.
I also believe I may have asked you this exact question before, but that was way back when I wrote it, and eventually figured I'd "get it later." It's later now.
With a sigh, she surveyed the scene that had unfolded here: Four security guards pointed cattle prods at an eighteen-year-old blonde with her hands in the air. Before she managed to approach her assumed niece, Lilith was blocked by Hospitality’s crew manager, Linda, who nervously tapped a tablet.
The problem lies with "assumed niece." I need a better, but still compact way, to formulate it.
The dynamics between Lilith and the blonde eighteen-year-old (Kayleigh) are as follows:
Lilith is a long time friend of Kayleigh's parents. Nothing more. No adoptions, godparenting, or anything official. She's just been a friend of the family for so long that she's sort of become Aunt Lilith. Most of us have got someone like that, right?
Readers who have read the previous books should be able to infer the meaning, but my betareaders keep suggesting this is not adequate wording.
I can't just leave it at "niece" either, because there has been some godmothering going on with someone else, and previously known dynamics have shifted some, but Lilith is really just an unoffical aunt.
I also believe I may have asked you this exact question before, but that was way back when I wrote it, and eventually figured I'd "get it later." It's later now.
With a sigh, she surveyed the scene that had unfolded here: Four security guards pointed cattle prods at an eighteen-year-old blonde with her hands in the air. Before she managed to approach her assumed niece, Lilith was blocked by Hospitality’s crew manager, Linda, who nervously tapped a tablet.
The problem lies with "assumed niece." I need a better, but still compact way, to formulate it.
The dynamics between Lilith and the blonde eighteen-year-old (Kayleigh) are as follows:
Lilith is a long time friend of Kayleigh's parents. Nothing more. No adoptions, godparenting, or anything official. She's just been a friend of the family for so long that she's sort of become Aunt Lilith. Most of us have got someone like that, right?
Readers who have read the previous books should be able to infer the meaning, but my betareaders keep suggesting this is not adequate wording.
I can't just leave it at "niece" either, because there has been some godmothering going on with someone else, and previously known dynamics have shifted some, but Lilith is really just an unoffical aunt.