Turn an article headline into a novel!

[JT Woody]

Obviously you dont have to write a 300 page novel...

I saw this NPR headline and the creative goblin in me ran with it!


(Picture because i'd already shared this with some friends and didnt feel like copy/pasting, lol)

 

[Heartlet Happer]

Using Synchrotron Microtomography Paleontologists Find Trilobite’s Last Meal in 465-Million-Year-Old Fossilized Stomach

Tagline: All explosive oats for me and not for thee.

Blurb: It was the best of geological periods, it was the worst of geological periods. It was the era of plenty, it was the era of scarcity. It was epoch of hard body bomb shells, it was epoch of iron stomachs. One quiet morning a trilobite named Cambrian had a particularly large breakfast ..

 

[Homer Potvin]

Using Synchrotron Microtomography Paleontologists Find Trilobite’s Last Meal in 465-Million-Year-Old Fossilized Stomach

Tagline: All explosive oats for me and not for thee.

Blurb: It was the best of geological periods, it was the worst of geological periods. It was the era of plenty, it was the era of scarcity. It was epoch of hard body bomb shells, it was epoch of iron stomachs. One quiet morning a trilobite named Cambrian had a particularly large breakfast ..

Well, if my ass dies tonight and I become fossilized for posterity to analyze my stomach contents, they'll find rabe and sausage, some valentine's cake, and half a bottle of Bordeaux. Draw whatever biological conclusions of humanity you like with that.