*drumroll* Presenting ... Brynja Olafsdottir, a struggling onion-farmer's daughter and wannabe Norse raider in Viking Norway.
Brynja loves her parents, but longs to be part of a Viking longship, going on raids and having adventures like her (male) friends in the neighbourhood.
Brynja hates Harald Bjornsson, a wealthy trader's son just down the street. Bjorn is a rich smug sononvabitch and Harald, his son, has his toffee nose in the air 'cos his daddy's rich. So, she's frustrated by circumstance.
One day an English trade ship crashes on the shores of Norway, and everybody dies. But as Bjorn says, they're only stupid
foreigners, so who cares?
Brynja grabs her father's shovel and comes down to the beach as soon as she can, in the hope of finding if she can help somebody. She can't. But there's no-one around yet, and she finds a shield and a maille hauberk that more or less fits her.
She can't lug all that stuff through town, or everyone will see and start asking questions. So, she buries it on the beach and strolls back into town, pretending that she just found the shovel.
Later that night, at midnight, when nobody is watching she digs up the stuff and admires it. She already has a spear that she uses to keep the wolves away. Now that she has a hauberk and shield, she can be a Viking warrior.
But Harald the stupid toffee-nosed git tries to ruin everything, and blame her for stealing it. Her reply? You have no proof, so nyah. ;-P
The whole thing blows up, and King Haakon the Good comes down himself to restore order. He orders a trial by combat -- first person to be wounded loses.
Brynja wins, and Good King Haakon declares her a true Viking and invites her on his next trip abroad. Huzzah!
(Sorry, once I started, I couldn't stop. ;-) And yes, it sounds like a cartoon - but all the names are plausible, and there actually was a King Haakon the Good of Norway, so it could happen. I even have a title for this story: "You've Got Maille!")
