It Began in a Tavern (OOC Thread) (Part 2)

[IgnitedxSoul]

I'm good with those changes! Though it begs the question on if Silas Cromwell should be called a "prince" like he is now instead of like a duke.

 

[Homer Potvin]

Also, I realize that I may have messed up the geography by misunderstanding what a peninsula is. I thought that a peninsula was land surrounded by water, but larger than an island. But a peninsula is supposed to be a piece of land that is surrounded by the ocean and still connects to the land.

Hahahahah.

Look at the ground: Crete is an island. Look out your window: Italy is a peninsula. I know you can't see Italy from your window, but you live in the land of peninsulas, islands, and isthmuses, bruh!

 

[ps102]

I'm good with those changes! Though it begs the question on if Silas Cromwell should be called a "prince" like he is now instead of like a duke.

I'm honestly not sure what the difference between a Duke and a Prince is.

Silas Cromwell was initially meant to be from the Northern Continent (I said peninsula because of misunderstandings). However, I am fine if you want him to be a local ruler in Cliffcross or a prince from another continent. We agreed that Brother Silas and Silas Cromwell are the same person, but Brother Silas has probably significantly changed as a person. He was a ruler essentially turned into leader of monks, which probably requires significant character transformation.

You can therefore do whatever you want with Silas Cromwell as long as it isn't anything crazy. Whether he is a prince or Duke is completely up to you honestly. You came up with the idea so its only right you get to build some background to his Cromwell self. If you want, I can also edit some details into my post. If, for example, you want to make him into a king, I'll happily edit that into the post since I have to make a bunch of edits anyway thanks to my idiocy!

You can also go ahead and even make a character sheet if you so wish, but it should mention that he later joined the monks and became their leader as Brother Silas, which should link to Louanne's sheet. That is a bit strange for us but it would give enough credit and seperation so you can work on his Cromwell self without making alternations to his Brother-monk self (beyond the ones already agreed obviously).

 

[Homer Potvin]

I'm honestly not sure what the difference between a Duke and a Prince is.

A duke rules over a duchy while a prince rules over a principality, though I believe a prince ranks higher on the royalty ladder while a duke is more of an aristocrat?

 

[ps102]

A duke rules over a duchy while a prince rules over a principality, though I believe a prince ranks higher on the royalty ladder while a duke is more of an aristocrat?

You probably know more on these subjects than I do. The beauty behind collaborative storytelling like this is that you have multiple minds to contribute knowledge, experience and voice!

 

[Homer Potvin]

You probably know more on these subjects than I do. The beauty behind collaborative storytelling like this is that you have multiple minds to contribute knowledge, experience and voice!

Holler if you need me!

 

[ps102]

Also, sorry if my communication has been kind of muddy in terms of clarity today. I've been pretty ill for the past two days. Besides everything else, I have pretty bad mind fog. Let me know if something I said doesn't quite make sense.

 

[IgnitedxSoul]

I had always assumed Prince meant "son of the king or queen" rather than "ruler of a principality" so I'm totally on board with keeping him as Prince Silas of Cliffcross.

After I finish writing the post and get a better sense of the action beats I'll flesh out the encyclopedia stuff!

 

[Louanne Learning]

I do feel pretty bad about it.

No trouble for us, and nothing to feel bad about. All I feel is great gratitude for you doing this for us!

Are you making up a new map, too?

 

[Louanne Learning]

Though it begs the question on if Silas Cromwell should be called a "prince" like he is now instead of like a duke.

I'll go with whatever you suggest, but in any case he would have renounced it when he entered the Abbey

 

[Louanne Learning]

if my communication has been kind of muddy in terms of clarity

Not at all!

I want here to say how much I love writing this story with the two of you!

I've been pretty ill for the past two days.

Oh no, I hope you are feeling better.

 

[Louanne Learning]

@IgnitedxSoul - here's what we have so far for Brother Silas. It needs several changes. I can work on it tomorrow, but what would you like me to add?


Name: Brother Silas

Sex: Male

Social Class: Silas is the ghost of a Poet-monk

Age in human years (must be 18): 52 at the time of his death, hundreds of years ago

A brief description of appearance: (no pictures, please.)

Silas is white-haired, and exudes serenity. He wears flowing robes that are the colours of the rainbow. (All other ghost-monks wear brown.)

Background:

Silas is the leader of the Ghosts of Kodama Abbey, the ghosts of a thousand monks destroyed by the Royals hundreds of years ago. The ghosts are awakened in the presence of the High Mage Hemios and the High Scientist Barnabas, while a Royal - Arthur - plays the violin, as it was ordained in the Scriptures. These ghosts have an important role to play in the final battle of good and evil. They contain the light of goodness.

 

[ps102]

No trouble for us, and nothing to feel bad about. All I feel is great gratitude for you doing this for us!

Thanks for your understanding!

Are you making up a new map, too?

Not really any reason to. What we have now is basically the entirety of the continent our story takes place on. It might seem small compared to real life, but believe me, its unwise to go big. Big maps = big commitments. Besides, even with the current map, we've only really been at small percentage of it, which is fine. The idea was that we all have a common visual of what the world looks like. I'm not sure how well that worked but hey, it's there...

The current map took me a week to make if I remember right.

Not at all!

I want here to say how much I love writing this story with the two of you!

Same! It always makes my day to read a new entry.

Oh no, I hope you are feeling better.I just hope it doesn't come back stronger. That does happen sometimes.

Better today. The first day was pure misery but now is the third day and it feels like I'm almost back to normal. Thank God it's almost spring. The colds are the worst parrt of this season.

 

[ps102]

Now that we all agree on the continent setup, I was thinking about real world inspirations.

The Southern Continent where Sophia is from has a lot of inspiration from Greece, particularly with the naming scheme, weather and terrain.

Which real world countries should the other continents be based on? I'm thinking the continent the story takes place on (which is the Western Continent as I suggested) is pretty close to the two American continents. Why? Because there seems to be a rather big diversity on names, which suggests multiculturalism. The Americas in general are associated with that, and also big scientific advances, which have been a big part of this story!

That, and also, you all are from the Americas as far as I'm aware. Louanne is from Canada and the rest of you from the USA, right? It would make sense to me to have it this way in honor of that. I say "Americas" because it's a way to include both real-world continents.

You all okay with that? If so, I can finalize the entry.

 

[Louanne Learning]

real world countries should the other continents be based on?

In one entry, I had Katara flirting with "soldiers from the Northern hilly country" and I based them on Scottish Highlanders

 

[ps102]

In one entry, I had Katara flirting with "soldiers from the Northern hilly country" and I based them on Scottish Highlanders

If you want the Northern Continent to be based on Scotland, then your wish is my command. I know you like Scotland a lot.

 

[ps102]

Does @IgnitedxSoul have any specific requests for the Eastern Continent?

We'll probably never touch these continents but it's nice to have something.

 

[Louanne Learning]

There were only two parts in the story that I could see a little bit of revision - just want to run it by you before I make the changes -
(one of the things needed to be explained was how the abbey became ruins in 20 years)

Old version -

Kodama Abbey once housed two hundred poet-monks. Now, all that remained were their graves and their ghosts, in and around the sprawl of roofless, crumbling stone walls between broken arches. Three high towers still stood mostly erect, their stone steps leading to lookouts housing birds’ nests and offering views of waving grasses speckled with wildflowers.

Revised version -

Kodama Abbey once housed a thousand poet-monks. In one night two decades past, dark magic killed them and turned their abbey into ruins. Now, all that remained were their graves and their ghosts, in and around the sprawl of roofless, crumbling stone walls between broken arches. Three high towers still stood mostly erect, their stone steps leading to lookouts housing birds’ nests and offering views of waving grasses speckled with wildflowers.

***

Old version -

Dusca and Barnabas dismounted on the road before the abandoned monastery ruins. “Do you know the story of Kodama Abbey?” Barnabas asked.

Dusca smiled at him. “The history, you mean?”

“Yes … it’s a frightful one.”

“From what I have heard, the monks led a rebellion against the monarchy.”

“And were then brutally destroyed.”

Revised version -

Dusca and Barnabas dismounted on the road before the abandoned monastery ruins. “Do you know the story of Kodama Abbey?” Barnabas asked.

Dusca smiled at him. “The history, you mean?”

“Yes … it’s a frightful one.”

“From what I have heard, the monks led a rebellion against the monarchy.”

Barnabas shook his head. “The truth is far more sinister. The monks—and their abbey—were destroyed in pursuit of fragments of the gear.”

 

[ps102]

Looks good to me. The only thing that stands out is this: "In one night two decades past, dark magic killed them and turned their abbey into ruins."

Dark magic is the taboo blood magic Luxuria introduced, so this wouldn't make a lot of sense.

Barnabas shook his head. “The truth is far more sinister. The monks—and their abbey—were destroyed in pursuit of fragments of the gear.”

I like how you add a sinister truth to the end. That makes a lot of sense because Melina would obviously not want to publicly commit genocide. What should probably happen is: She uses her earthquake magic to sink the place into ruins (and kill everyone in the process) and blame it into some supernatural event or something else.

Just suggestions.

 

[Louanne Learning]

"In one night two decades past, dark magic killed them and turned their abbey into ruins."

I was wondering about that myself. How about if I change it to "ambitious royals"