It Began in a Tavern (OOC Thread) (Part 2)

[Louanne Learning]

but it's another subplot that we don't really need.

Agreed. I think we have enough to go on already?

 

[Luxuria]

I'm not sure what you mean by self-indulgent tango. Do you mean scenes that highly focus on Ravenna? Those are good. We want those!

I totally welcome more Ravenna scenes!

Well, to me Self-indulgent-tango pieces need to be few and far between. Because when I think of those scenes, it's Ravenna being angsty, sad and self-pitying for a whole post, drawing all attention to her and her problems. I am sure we will have a few for all characters, but I know I could go very deep into Ravenna's issues. Which may be the focus of a few posts, like the one I wrote when we learned how she escaped the lab. I am glad you want more Ravenna scenes, but I also want to make sure I don't derail the plot for a pity-party. Hahah. I swear I will write some occasionally.

 

[ps102]

It's another sub-plot, yes. But I think what always gets me in stories that it feels like no one else is trying to do something. When in fact, to me, it's more realistic if there are several people trying to do things in different ways. This whole research thing doesn't need to be a huge plot- not all. It may just need to be mentioned a bit, because it feels more realistic that there would be many people dissatisfied with the way things are and trying to change it how they see fit.

That's true. The thing is though, they don't need to be a success. They can be an utter failure with only a high body count to show for the efforts.

I'm in agreement with that. If you want to do that, you can of course feel free to.

Agreed. I think we have enough to go on already?

Yeah, we've got lots that we need to build up on. I'm not even entirely sure how we'd go on about doing it.

 

[Louanne Learning]

I totally welcome more Ravenna scenes!

me, too. She is still somewhat of an enigma to me.

 

[Luxuria]

Agreed. I think we have enough to go on already?

I think we do, but it's another possible sub-thread-plot that could be used later if needed. This is another angle/political thread to consider, honestly. I know in my own stories, I always have too many political plots going on, but I find it fun. It's okay if this doesn't fit, but I wanted to suggest it.

 

[Louanne Learning]

Because when I think of those scenes, it's Ravenna being angsty, sad and self-pitying for a whole post, drawing all attention to her and her problems. I am sure we will have a few for all characters, but I know I could go very deep into Ravenna's issues. Which may be the focus of a few posts, like the one I wrote when we learned how she escaped the lab. I am glad you want more Ravenna scenes, but I also want to make sure I don't derail the plot for a pity-party. Hahah. I swear I will write some occasionally.

The solution to this is to make Ravenna an agent of some sort of change for the group - some action she is called upon to perform

 

[Luxuria]

I'm in agreement with that. If you want to do that, you can of course feel free to.

I will see if it fits. If it doesn't, I'll leave it out. I may just have Charin mention it and that's that. No idea.

me, too. She is still somewhat of an enigma to me.

Okay, cool. Good to know you guys want more. More you shall have! I just thought of an interesting scene. I am happy you want to know more about her and having a few focus scenes are okay.

 

[ps102]

I am happy you want to know more about her and having a few focus scenes are okay.

I'm still not entirely sure what the problem with focus scenes are. A guideline in writing is that the closer you are to a character, the better things get.

I mentioned Earthsea a few posts ago. I loved the story but the writing wasn't my favourite for this reason. Too distant and not close enough to the main character. It used too much summary, and never went close to moments as they happened.

When I read things, I want them to dive deep into a character's soul.

 

[Luxuria]

The solution to this is to make Ravenna an agent of some sort of change for the group - some action she is called upon to perform

Agreed. How can we do this? I don't think killing her will work as well as we want. Because that's temporary. I would consider the following:

1. We learn Ravenna was from Cliffcross originally and she's returning to find her village frozen in time. (Possible? Because we don't know WHEN time got messed up.) She wants to free everyone and is torn, because on the one hand, she's free. But also because she was forced to leave, she suffered a lot. But she also wonders if she would have suffered more being frozen in time.

2. We learn the above AND Ravenna knows her time is limited and she's slowly dying. Most likely her liver's giving out and she wonders if she can freeze herself in time. If she could join the others to at least stop her death until she can find her family. Or, if she can somehow use time to save herself and her family.

3. Ravenna is STILL slowly dying, but hasn't told anyone and is trying to find her family ASAP. Hopes that Olive's powers can help her or save her. Is ashamed she's afraid of death, because she now has something to care about. Katara and Olive and wants to help anyway she can, even if it's saving their lives at her own expense.

Or, some combo of all three? I wonder if she jumped at the chance to go on this journey was because her home is cliffcross or something.

 

[Louanne Learning]

We learn Ravenna was from Cliffcross originally and she's returning to find her village frozen in time.

This might be an idea. Then, you'd have to figure out how this plays into her helping Olive.

We learn the above AND Ravenna knows her time is limited and she's slowly dying.

With this idea, you might consider Ravenna somehow sacrificing herself in order to help Olive.

Is ashamed she's afraid of death, because she now has something to care about.

This is a good, solid lead. So, she will do something very selfless in Cliffcross, (in whatever plan we come up with for Olive to reach her destiny) risking her life for Olive and what is good - and maybe even learns that life is worth living, after all.

 

[Luxuria]

I'm still not entirely sure what the problem with focus scenes are. A guideline in writing is that the closer you are to a character, the better things get.

*Puts on Edgy McEdgeface's spiky iron crown tipped with gold-leaf* Because I know I can go overboard and don't want to drag the other characters too far into Ravenna's inner-drama. I don't want Olive and Katara to have to play the 'comforting friends' for too many posts. But I will allow them to maybe a few times throughout the story. I think a nightmare is soon in order.

When I read things, I want them to dive deep into a character's soul.

I completely understand and I am happy to do that. I just want to be considerate of everyone else in the process.

This might be an idea. Then, you'd have to figure out how this plays into her helping Olive.

I am sure I can weave it in well, if that's a decent path.

With this idea, you might consider Ravenna somehow sacrificing herself in order to help Olive.

Yep! That's been on the table for months. Ages ago, I was not sure if Ravenna was going to make it to the end of the story alive. So, she will most likely do this at some point.

This is a good, solid lead. So, she will do something very selfless in Cliffcross, (in whatever plan we come up with for Olive to reach her destiny) risking her life for Olive and what is good - and maybe even learns that life is worth living, after all.

Thanks. I think I like it, too. I think we should have it be a plot point once we get to Cliffcross. I am thinking that on the journey, we learn Ravenna's dying of liver failure and when we reach Cliffcross, she can't hide it anymore and tells the others the truth. But also, hasn't figured out why she's so scared yet. That way, we can have a dramatic scene and then, add more to it later to give it depth. Also, not explain it all at once. I am thinking Ravenna collapses or something. (I'd go for puking blood, but that's because I'm me.) Because the scientists messed up while experimenting.

But the one question is, do we let a healing mage save her? Or better put, what are the limits of a healing mage?

General quick search:Liver Failure & What It Means

 

[Louanne Learning]

But the one question is, do we let a healing mage save her?

Surprise us!

 

[ps102]

Or, some combo of all three? I wonder if she jumped at the chance to go on this journey was because her home is cliffcross or something.

That's a great idea. You can do a small flashback to add this information, and it would make a lot of sense too.

3. Ravenna is STILL slowly dying, but hasn't told anyone and is trying to find her family ASAP. Hopes that Olive's powers can help her or save her. Is ashamed she's afraid of death, because she now has something to care about. Katara and Olive and wants to help anyway she can, even if it's saving their lives at her own expense.

I think that's best one. Both Katara and Ravenna should "believe" in Olive's power to make true change. At the same time, they should know that they're all needed and are important as the scriptures have predicted.

That's why we need to figure out their roles and such in the journey. By the end, when we read back, we should think that the end result couldn't have been done without all three of them.

 

[Luxuria]

Surprise us!

Okay. I will. Can I expand on the Healing Mage Lore?

 

[ps102]

Okay. I will. Can I expand on the Healing Mage Lore?

I don't see why you couldn't. As long as the rules of the system are followed, anything is possible. But you can also add new rules as long as they're reasonable.

The magic system can always be expanded. It's happened already.

 

[Luxuria]

That's a great idea. You can do a small flashback to add this information, and it would make a lot of sense too.

Thanks! I will. I am glad it makes sense. I just thought of it while I was writing that post. Haha. That's how my writing brain works.

I think that's best one. Both Katara and Ravenna should "believe" in Olive's power to make true change. At the same time, they should know that they're all needed and are important as the scriptures have predicted.

Agreed. I think this is what I will start with. So, a scene for Ravenna at Cliffcross, then.

That's why we need to figure out their roles and such in the journey. By the end, when we read back, we should think that the end result couldn't have been done without all three of them.

I agree. Looking back, this should all somewhat make sense/characters have grown.

 

[Luxuria]

I don't see why you couldn't. As long as the rules of the system are followed, anything is possible. But you can also add new rules as long as they're reasonable.

The magic system can always be expanded. It's happened already.

Awesome.

I am just wondering if Olive is the ONLY light mage. Because laser/red light healing works well on wounds in real life. There are also possibilities that air mages could also be healing along with earth ones. Thoughts?

 

[ps102]

I am just wondering if Olive is the ONLY light mage. Because laser/red light healing works well on wounds in real life. There are also possibilities that air mages could also be healing along with earth ones. Thoughts?

It depends on how the "healing" works. Do the mages make the chemicals that heal the body with their magic?

Also, yes, Olive is completely unique because she has total command of light through Yuuna. There are mages who have made light with magic through a combination of elemental magic (some chemicals create light when mixed. Remember old cameras!) but Olive is completely different when it comes to its creation.

A bit more on the camera thing—I had such a camera. It was a non-electronic Kodak that had magic "cubes". The cubes had chemicals in them that, when the capture button is pressed, would be mixed together to create a light-generation reaction. I'm telling you this: I've genuinely never seen such bright light from a small camera. I could see brightness even with my hand over my closed eyes.

I still have it. It was my Grandfather's. I don't have any more cubes though

 

[Luxuria]

It depends on how the "healing" works. Do the mages make the chemicals that heal the body with their magic?

True, true. This may honestly come down to science, not magic. Oh, I think I got it. A weird but useful side-quest? Trying to find a scientist with enough skill to save Ravenna. Because to fix what's wrong with her, I think the scientist would have to operate. Magic won't cut it here, because it's an internal problem. Also, since Ravenna's a lab rat, it makes things more complicated.

Also, yes, Olive is completely unique because she has total command of light through Yuuna. There are mages who have made light with magic through a combination of elemental magic (some chemicals create light when mixed. Remember old cameras!) but Olive is completely different when it comes to its creation.

I figured she was and didn't want to step on any toes. But I have a few ideas.

A bit more on the camera thing—I had such a camera. It was a non-electronic Kodak that had magic "cubes". The cubes had chemicals in them that, when the capture button is pressed, would be mixed together to create a light-generation reaction. I'm telling you this: I've genuinely never seen such bright light from a small camera. I could see brightness even with my hand over my closed eyes.

Ah, yes. I remember those cameras. Ugh. My eyes. Sounds like a cool camera, though.

 

[Louanne Learning]

Trying to find a scientist with enough skill to save Ravenna.

I think this would be a great plot twist for Barnabas. Part of the climax, possibly after he discovers Katara is his daughter