If you click on this thread you must post on it...

[Louanne Learning]

This was in the Niagara News today (I don't think they distribute moose)

‘Quantum leap’ in food distribution as new Community Care West Niagara warehouse opens​

 

[GrahamLewis]

From the Only in Wyoming Department:

"After a Laramie man totaled his car colliding with a moose in the dark early morning hours Monday, he and his fiancée hoped that they could at least claim the meat. But then somebody else came along and stole their roadkill."

This was in today's Cowboy State Daily News.

Curious about how long the moose lay there after its demise -- did the couple drive off to get a truck to haul it away, or simply choose to let it age on the highway for a few days?

 

[Louanne Learning]

What did the chef say when he cooked moose instead of beef?

Oh no, I've made a huge moosesteak!

 

[Rath Darkblade]

Groan. That's up there with the classic joke about the alligator sandwich. "And make it snappy!"

But now I have to wonder: could it be a piranha sandwich, instead, without impairing the punchline? Or would it be a sandwich that takes a bite out of you?

 

[Louanne Learning]

What is a chicken's favourite book?

Great Eggs-peck-tations

 

[Rath Darkblade]

What is a chicken's favourite book?

Great Eggs-peck-tations

What is a famous book that would teach you how to open a bottle of wine?

Oliver Twisted

 

[CatrionaGrace]

And once again, the gang rolls with it...

 

[Louanne Learning]

I had an uncle who rolled his own cigarettes.

That reminds me of a catchy tune from 1947 - Smoke! Smoke! Smoke! - Tex Williams in the "talking blues" style of singing

 

[Set2Stun]

Just hanging out in bed with a snoozing kitty, watching Blue Jays baseball. Still no luck on the jobs front, but I've sold 6 books in April so far (4 paperbacks!), so I got that goin' for me, which is nice.

 

[CatrionaGrace]

The PowerPoint project drags on...

 

[Rath Darkblade]

I had an uncle who rolled his own cigarettes.

That reminds me of a catchy tune from 1947 - Smoke! Smoke! Smoke! - Tex Williams in the "talking blues" style of singing

I just found this: Danny Kaye and Louis Armstrong scat-singing together.

Just priceless. Two old masters having fun. You can see how much respect and admiration they had for each other. And in a film created in 1959, no less.

Respect to the both of them.

 

[Homer Potvin]

I unintentionally wrote "affect" and "effect" correctly in the same sentence today. It's not a great sentence and could be cleared, but I don't want to change it now because that'll probably never happen organically again.

 

[CatrionaGrace]

I am so proud of you, Homer.

 

[Pending]

I unintentionally wrote "affect" and "effect" correctly in the same sentence today.

congrats.

 

[Homer Potvin]

I am so proud of you, Homer.

congrats.

Thanks. It's actually a terrible sentence (fragment) that I just whacked, but whatever:

"A classic portrait taken a year ago in his little navy uniform, noteworthy for his stoic military affect as opposed to his famous smile, which had the opposite effect and made him look even more even more innocent and darling."

 

[CatrionaGrace]

Thanks. It's actually a terrible sentence (fragment) that I just whacked, but whatever:

"A classic portrait taken a year ago in his little navy uniform, noteworthy for his stoic military affect as opposed to his famous smile, which had the opposite effect and made him look even more even more innocent and darling."

Well whacked, sir. Well whacked.

 

[Louanne Learning]

A conversation my niece (the nurse) had with a patient at her Boston hospital -

The patient said, "You're not from around here. Where are you from?"

My niece answered, "Canada."

The patient replied, "Ya I can tell, your mannerisms are different and you're kind and polite ... definitely not from around here. I was going to say Danish."

 

[Homer Potvin]

A conversation my niece (the nurse) had with a patient at her Boston hospital -

The patient said, "You're not from around here. Where are you from?"

My niece answered, "Canada."

The patient replied, "Ya I can tell, your mannerisms are different and you're kind and polite ... definitely not from around here. I was going to say Danish."

They don't call them Massholes for nothing.

 

[Pending]

What did the chef say when he cooked moose instead of beef?

Oh no, I've made a huge moosesteak!

hardy har har