The Jade Empire - OOC Thread

[Whiskii]

I think Zǐhuǒ would make an awesome addition to the story

@ellekaldwin @buttercream @Whiskii - we are especially looking for ways that we can integrate this new character into our story.

Should we connect him sometime in the past with Tobais Locke? Or the Immortal Brothers of the Mountain? Or??

Or start him on a separate narrative arc that eventually intersects with established arcs?

I think giving him a past with Locke could be interesting....

 

[buttercream]

Ooh, he's cool.

Should we connect him sometime in the past with Tobais Locke? Or the Immortal Brothers of the Mountain? Or??

Or start him on a separate narrative arc that eventually intersects with established arcs?

I also like the idea of him being affiliated with Locke somehow. Would the Immortal Brothers of the Mountain ignore such a malfunction, though? Zǐhuǒ could be connected to both. It'd give the Brothers another reason to get involved with everything, too.

That can technically all happen on-screen, really, so whether Zǐhuǒ's arc starts separately depends on the direction/s @Username: required wants to take his story.

 

[Louanne Learning]

I think giving him a past with Locke could be interesting....

I also like the idea of him being affiliated with Locke somehow

This seems like a good idea to me, too. So, we need to hear from @ellekaldwin since Locke is her character.

Elle - how would you like the story to proceed in integrating Zǐhuǒ?

 

[Username: required]

After some reading of the profiles of a few characters, I see that Locke and Zihuo have a lot in common. I was thinking... Maybe they were friends for a while before both went there separate ways, and Zihuo wanted to be better than Locke but ultimately became his own mistake? Let's see what their player thinks of this, and the rest of you guys. Just an idea of course, nothing is going down until they themselves have responded.

@buttercream @ellekaldwin @Whiskii @Louanne Learning

 

[Louanne Learning]

Maybe they were friends for a while before both went there separate ways, and Zihuo wanted to be better than Locke but ultimately became his own mistake?

I like the idea of them following the "friends to enemies" trope. That has a lot of potential. So we would see them as adversaries now?

Maybe in time, we can uncover some significant event that caused their rift ...

 

[ellekaldwin]

I like this character too. He could be maybe a former mentor/friend to Locke whom Locke corrupted with his evil, dastardly plans for world domination (or something like that) or maybe they matched each other's levels of evil and bounced off each other. I kinda like the idea of Locke just finding a random man and experimenting on him and turning him into a hybrid. I'm down for whatever! I think it makes more sense for him to have ties to Locke than with the Immortal boyband of the mountains.

 

[Louanne Learning]

I kinda like the idea of Locke just finding a random man and experimenting on him and turning him into a hybrid.

I love this! It seems more believable that our hybrid would have that done to him, rather than he doing it to himself.

@Username: required - what do you think? This would change your backstory a bit. If you are set on having him doing this to himself - that he turned himself into a hybrid - if his character depends on it - then maybe he could have at least been working with Locke when it happened?

It all depends on how you want his past to impact him.

 

[Username: required]

I actually love this idea, but I like the idea of turning himself into a hybrid, but he could have been working with Locke when it happened, yes. I like it a lot!

 

[Louanne Learning]

but I like the idea of turning himself into a hybrid, but he could have been working with Locke when it happened

Alright, maybe you can add a couple sentences about this to his backstory in his character profile

 

[Username: required]

Alright, maybe you can add a couple sentences about this to his backstory in his character profile

I will do that as time allows!

 

[Whiskii]

Post is FINALLY up! Do let me know if anyone is out of character.

 

[Louanne Learning]

Post is FINALLY up! Do let me know if anyone is out of character.

Great job, but i do have a couple of questions -

Tala loosing her drone is quite a big change - and maybe that should have been up to @ellekaldwin

Also, I was confused by them going back to a Shanghai bath in the middle of their great journey forwards? It kind of ignored what came before

 

[Louanne Learning]

@Username: required - I'd like to add Zǐhuǒ to our character profile list - with this one sentence added to his backstory -

Zǐhuǒ intersected with Tobais Locke and his life was never the same.

Okay?

Then I will post the character profile.

You've been added to the official story line-up, which means you would be next to add an entry to the story.

But before you begin, let's iron out the ambiguities in the last official entry.

 

[Username: required]

@Username: required - I'd like to add Zǐhuǒ to our character profile list - with this one sentence added to his backstory -

Zǐhuǒ intersected with Tobais Locke and his life was never the same.

Okay?

Then I will post the character profile.

You've been added to the official story line-up, which means you would be next to add an entry to the story.

But before you begin, let's iron out the ambiguities in the last official entry.

Okay then, you can add that sentence. What do you mean by ambiguities, if I may ask?

Edit: I read the posts before and have figured it out lol

 

[Whiskii]

Great job, but i do have a couple of questions -

Tala loosing her drone is quite a big change - and maybe that should have been up to @ellekaldwin

Also, I was confused by them going back to a Shanghai bath in the middle of their great journey forwards? It kind of ignored what came before

Hmm... I actually was debating including a scene in a bathhouse or not... should I cut it out if it adds nothing to the story?

 

[Louanne Learning]

in a bathhouse

I think you can keep the scene, it's a good centering scene, but make it somewhere close to where they are, so their journey is not interrupted, but they are still continuing forward instead of backtracking to Shanghai

And I think we still need Cedarheart in the story

Thank you!

 

[Whiskii]

I've updated my post. Do let me know if anything else is amiss

 

[Louanne Learning]

I've updated my post

Changes are good! Thank you for making them.

I'm a little concerned about characterization, though. No need to make changes, but I was unsure about the introduction of confrontations between our characters, which didn't seem to follow from what we knew of them before.

Just a reminder to all players, that if you have a question about how a character should react, it's best to check with that character's creator.

For example - this passage with Rennie - just didn't seem like Rennie -

Rennie’s face flushed. Despite this, he still did not let go of Daiyu’s hand.

“Oh really? Try shooting straight when you’re having a vision!” he cried, then lowered his voice so that Bertrand could not hear, “And don’t think I haven’t seen you making eyes at the German, lass…”

I doubt he would flush, or hold Daiyu's hand in front of the others, or confront/attack another in this defensive manner


So, just a gentle reminder to all to try to keep character consistent from post to post.


BTW, I have edited Rennie’s dialogue to his Scottish accent -

“Oh really? Try shooting straight when ye’re having a vision,” he cried, then lowered his voice so that Bertrand could not hear. “An’ dinna think I havena seen ye making eyes at the German lass…”

 

[Whiskii]

Changes are good! Thank you for making them.

I'm a little concerned about characterization, though. No need to make changes, but I was unsure about the introduction of confrontations between our characters, which didn't seem to follow from what we knew of them before.

Just a reminder to all players, that if you have a question about how a character should react, it's best to check with that character's creator.

For example - this passage with Rennie - just didn't seem like Rennie -



I doubt he would flush, or hold Daiyu's hand in front of the others, or confront/attack another in this defensive manner


So, just a gentle reminder to all to try to keep character consistent from post to post.


BTW, I have edited Rennie’s dialogue to his Scottish accent -

“Oh really? Try shooting straight when ye’re having a vision,” he cried, then lowered his voice so that Bertrand could not hear. “An’ dinna think I havena seen ye making eyes at the German lass…”

I've made some small edits.

And unfortunately, due to life catching up and getting very busy, I don't think I'll be able to continue being in this RP. I hope you all bring this story to a satisfying conclusion, and thanks for having me.